Even if you tried to keep yourself busy and all packed up trying not to bother bad thoughts and people around you, sometimes you can't run away from being fucked up and feeling all alone. You keep denying but sooner or later the feeling still comes you just can't. You think by running all the way from Westwood to your place seeing only dark clouds and shining moon it will soothe your heart out though needless to say you did feel way lot better after making a call to Malaysia talking to your parents.
But you can't always bug people with your problems or randomly scroll down your directory calling your friends telling how sucks your day is you can't expect they are forever free for that, can you.? On the first thought I'd think talking to Dad is the most comforting solution, or perhaps calling someone you called bffs would be helpful but then again you can't always be dependable on others they have their own practices to attend, assignments to be done and businesses to mend, no? :X
Awesome. Now it feels like you're a complete loner in the whole world. Nobody to talk to, have to keep up with things, restless you haven't done a thing for yourself, family isn't around to pat your shoulders and say, hang-on-there-and-keep-carrying-on but yeah, you forget that there'll always someone there for you to talk to. Someone whom you often forget when you have laughters and feel needed when you have tears.
Nature of a human being, we only seek help and guidance when we feel burdened and saddened. I don't say this is okay but true it's truee, we only seek Him when we're troubled, sicked and despaired. Aye, we keep forgetting things. We keep forgetting Him. In fact I did it too :l My last few steps before entering the hall, I remembered the Dhikr. (See how awful I was >.<") I might have walked myself hundreds of steps all the way from Westwood thinking how despaired I was and how bad my day had gotten but that was about it. The very few dhikr I said before getting myself into IH, they made a change. I felt refreshed. Relieved as if half of the burden finally been lifted away to the ground and pooff, they went missing :") If you ask me to explain I'd say I don't really know how to reason cause perhaps it's just in my mind but I'd rather to believe that maybe, it's a God's gift for those who remember & praise Him he'll offer you peace for souls and remain you directed in any circumstances :)
The Prophet reported what its Allah s.w.t had said: “That which remembers Me in itself, I will remember him in Myself. That which remembers Me in an assembly, I will remember him in a better assembly. ” [Quoted by Bukhârî]
I don't intend to say that hey you've gone a wrong way lets change cause I might have gone off to the wrong way either but it's good for us sometimes to share things and keep reminding one another. We're all busy with stuffs, aye I admit but perhaps in between lapses we could do dhikr so that we don't get too engaged and absorbed by the world activities and that when you get stress up, you know there's always someone there for you offering you strength. The simplest you could do when you're in the middle of hectic days is to put on some dhikr or nasyid in your mp3 player and listen to them. I prefer full volume :) You might be thinking aaahh what that's for I'm not into nasyid nor Islamic songs kind of type but blimey, we don't know when we gonna need them, we will but we can't tell when. If Adam Lambert, Kesha, MCR, Bruno Mars and Korean songs can make up your playlist so why can't them? :") Just few and they will cause you no harm, trust me. InsyaAllah it shall soothe your soul calm and indeed, to some extend it gives you the elixir for the day :)
You might have your own fave list but this is one of mine:
Everytime you feel like you cannot go on
Sometimes I know you know it feels like you are missing something deep within
you feel so far away from Him
that you are so much sinned.
Trust me, always turn for Him.